12 February 2007

Thinking Online: Humanzees, Dimetheyltriptamine, and my Alien Abduction Story

When I was two we moved, briefly, to Dallas for a summer internship. We moved there for good the following year. All my memories from the time of the internship seem to happen at night. After being put to bed I would often lay awake for an hour or so. I had a pair of wind-up toy robots which I called Reddy and Bluey. As I lay there in bed Reddy and Bluey would start to walk across the room, along with other toys. I wasn't so bothered by the robots, since they were wind ups, but the Legos, that was a little strange. Eventually these nighttime hallucinations became more elaborate and began to inform my dreams thematically.

My bed was tucked into a corner of the room, touching the walls on the right side and at the foot. One night a group of monsters, or aliens as I thought of them, surrounded the bed and began to walk around it. The aliens had strange faces, all different, and were two dimensional (which makes me think the whole event may have been caused by cars driving around in the parking lot with their lights on), allowing them to slide smoothly between the bed and the wall. They were actually quite similar to the urSkeks in The Dark Crystal, but that film was released in 1982, and this happened in 1979. When the aliens appeared I was unable to move, but I did manage to call out to my parents in the next room, who's answer was something along the lines of "We'll worry about it in the morning." This particular hallucination set off a series of alien dreams quite similar to classic abduction stories coupled with absurd dream logic. In them I was continually on the run, or being carried around by men in silvery suits and helmets with dark faceplates. I may have been in a ship in some of the dreams, but in the one I remember most vividly I was in an oneiric version of our apartment with an altered floor plan. I was sitting on my parent's bed in their relocated bedroom playing with my sock-monkey (I think his name was George). At some point the room became illuminated by a red light that had no obvious source, as though it came from the floor (I was fascinated by lava). One of the spacemen popped up from behind the bed, but apparently couldn't get me as long as I stayed in the center of the bed and didn't go near the edges. I continued playing with the sock-monkey, and during our game he misbehaved in some unspecified way. I punished him by throwing him off the bed, which broke the magic circle, and meant that the aliens could get him, and me. One jumped up on the bed and began to carry me off. I tried to call out, but couldn't speak. I have no idea what happened after that. I seem to remember being carried down the hall, perhaps onto the ship, or maybe I woke up.

Never did I imagine these were actual abductions, I took them for what they were, hallucinations and dreams. I had another batch of similar experiences when I was a teenager--sleep paralysis, autoscopic hallucinations, I even spent an entire night inside Pavel Tchelitchew's Hide-and-Seek. Those experiences along with the "abductions," have formed part of my personal mythology, somewhat along the lines of Joseph Beuys's personal mythology, I just don't give lectures on them or present them as facts.

The other day I had a chance to rethink these experiences thanks, in part, to the network structure of the internet, and something I would like to call "thinking online" (though "daydreaming" might be more appropriate). I was researching human-ape hybrids, of all things. I'm fascinated by hybrids, by the fluidity of genes, and their ability to cross our imposed boundaries of species, and even genus. For a short time I had a cat that was an F1 Bengal. Bengals are actually an inter-genus hybrid of the the common house cat (Felis catus) and the Asian Leopard Cat (Prionailurus bengalensis). Like most cat hybrids the first few generations of males tend to be sterile, and huge, as is the case with ligers and tigrons.

Six or seven million years ago the line of apes that was to become genus Homo split off from the relatives of modern chimps (genus Pan) and for 1.5 million years they were separate species. At that point the two groups reunited and hybridized, the evidence being found on the X chromosome. This would seem to indicate that the hybridization resulted in fertile females and sterile males (as is the case with the aforementioned cat hybrids). In the 1920s Soviet scientist Ilya Ivanovich Ivanov began a series of ethically dubious, and ultimately unsuccessful, experiments to create a human-ape hybrid. One of the motivations behind such a hybrid is that the resulting creatures would be suitable for dirty, dangerous, and degrading work that "real" humans would like to avoid (umm, robots?). In my googling on the topic I came across a number of interesting stories, including that of Kelpie Wilson, author of a novel about a human-bonobo hybrid. During the writing process she became so obsessed with the idea that she came close to procuring bonobo sperm and trying the experiment herself. I also stumbled across the image on the left on a white-supremacist website (which I refuse to link to). Taken in the 1930s, it is of a North-African man, called Bassou by the Berbers who lived nearby. Information on Bassou is nearly impossible to find, most of it on white supremacist websites of dubious origin and despicable intent. Apparently he lived alone, could not speak, and lived on fruits and insects. It is my opinion that he was simply a lonely, probably microcephalous, human being. Not a hybrid, as alleged.

Many of my searches on poor, maligned Bassou did include the word "hybrid," which generated results including the alien-human hybrid theories of Dr. David M. Jacobs. The fact that a professor of history at Temple University would endanger his career on that sort of thing piqued my curiousity, naturally. Eventually that led me to the Wikipedia article on "self-transforming machine elves." Machine elves are entities encountered by Terence McKenna while tripping on dimethyltriptamine, and in some ways are similar to the classic grey aliens of Roswell fame. Supposedly these machine elves create reality as we perceive it through their constant dance. About twenty percent of all people who take DMT as a drug (it is actually a naturally occurring substance in the human body, related chemically to seratonin and melatonin) experience hallucinations much like McKenna's, and nearly identical to the experiences had by alien abductees. Naturally occurring DMT has also been linked to such things as sleep paralysis and a feeling that one is not alone (when one in fact is). Those phenomena felt mighty familiar when I read about them. What amazes me now is not so much the experiences, which in a way are quite run-of-the-mill, but the fact that frivolous research on humazees could lead to a tenable explanation for one of the central mysteries of my childhood.

1 comment:

  1. This is my alien encouter.I was 15.This is one out of 7 abdutiones i had.This was my first one. (I will have to warn you that some of this is friting).It was about 11o'clock at night, i was just lining down in my bed thinking about my day.When i heard a bussing sound,then a blinding light.Then i saw them, ther not like the things that pepple reported.But my abdutes where about 5-6Ft. but thay kindove looked just like us, thay had the same hare,throut,nose,evey thang.but the only thanges diffrent is thay had difrent kind of fingers thay where longer,ther eyes wher pure blacksh blue and the alien was naked. Once i saw them I tried to move, but i cudn't.It felt like i was perlised head to toe,the only thang i can move is my eyes.after that two more came in,thay tour all of my sheets off my bed and stared to examaing me with ther eyes.Then started rubing ther hands on me and then started twisting my skin and looked at my vanes on my wristed and a lot of other thangs. I over herd one ,it said ( that i was a perfet specemen),then thay nauded to agement.Then one of them put 4 small prisim boxes on the corners of me,then i have a tingly sication on my back, then i rose about 2 feet off my bed and started going towards the window, but somehow i went thrue my close window.Then i went into the blinding light and began to rise into the ship.
    Once i was on bord thay carred me down a vary long dim lighed hallway to theis room which had a michean, then thay put me in this machen.This machen had some kind of horizonal lazer. Which started at my head and going down to my feet.Which cut away my PJ's off when it pased over my boody,which made me naked.Then thay toke me into a nogther room, it felt vary clean in it musted have bean the (clean room) of the ship, thay put me in an other machean which had a graded battom, then thay laide me down on this grade, then a bar started to move over me whit some kind of sprenkler system, which had started to squart lighty out some kind of gell, which coved me head to tow.Thean thy turnd me around on my belly and did it agean.Then another bar started cleand all the gell off me and then put me on my back and did it agin.Then Thy put high pureser of air on me, hits my body hard for 1hour.Then two of them came in and took me out of the machean, then took me to into a nother room. The next thang i new i was lang down on a cold flat steel table, ther was a lot of machens on the walls and cilling,which some has needls.I have been laing for 5 min.then thay came in and started to do a medical exam which thay examed every inch of my body,thay asow studdy like how long i was, how big my eyes where,what tupe of skin i had, what type of hair i had.thay counted my theath,took fingernall sample, and thay took a laser and cut my arm and took blood.Then thay whent out for about 25min.Whith in that time, whith out them notising the parlisaton went away. When thay came back in thay brout some siver cabnents with them, when thay open the cabnets i saw some intements some where vary long neddles, some form of twesers ,scappules,scissors,some of oily slimy subdences in a bowl, and alot of tubes.I was vary feriton, so I tride to excape.When i seted up thay grabed me and pused me back down on the table.I stugle very hard to get up agein, but thay where to stroung.So i new it was hopeles so i gave up. then one of them put sheat of claof like subdence over and under me, the only thang that was not cover by the colft was my face.Then i camed down because i thaut i was not going to be hurt. Then one of them pused a button and some steem came down from the cilling. Then i new that the claof turnd into some form of strong latex over me.It conneted me to the tabble.I was scerming my head off,because it begane to sqsase me for a short while once it stop I had vary little room to move. It feelt like being stuck in concret.While i was stile yelling,The one by my head put some of the extra latex behind my head over my head.It was vary hard to breath therw the material ,it was like breathing thre a plastick bage with little holes in it.One of them cut 9 holse in the material,1.my left eye,2. my right eye,3.my left ear,4.my right ear,5.my nose 6.my mouth 7..my belly button 8.#1 privet 9.#2 privet. When i was yelling the surgen put some kind of black sluge in my mouth then put a meatle mouth peace in my mouth ,then a long metle tube thrue the moute pece and then down my throut.An a nother but this felt like it went into my stumuck.I was gaging the hole time when thay wher puting the tubes down my therout. And then start adding a lot more of tubes going into all the openings in my body, ther must have been 30 tubes goin into me about 6 of them where going in my mouth and down my throat.And a lot of other thangs to perpar me to examen.One of them conneted a clear long tube to my #1 privet which had claws at the end of it and then it attach to me and caused a lot of pain then anoter tube inside of that ,which had gone into my #1privet.Some examationes was extemly panful, heres what i now what happen ,thay lower this machean from the siling and a 16in.neddle persed my bellbuton, and i was in a lot of pain. And then one of them coneted a vary long whire to the end of the meatle tube going down my trouth.And one of them turnd on a valve to the tube goin into my stumick,then my stumick started fell like it was starting to suck out my stumick(which was painfull). THen thay put a long about 2 in. wide mettle tube up my # 2 privet.The tube going to my #1 privet started suking (which was vary painful). After 2 1/2 of having extemley painfuil examanations.Then thay took all the tubes out and off of me(which some where jast as painful going in as going out). Thay paralised me agien and put a light over me and turnd it on,all of asodon the latex subdes was back to its ariognal form. Then two of them cared me off to a diferent room.
    The room was brigly lit and it was pure white inside,whit a pain of glass on a wall on the other side of the room with all of them watching me ,there was a small brown mat on the ground wich semed to be about 8 foot long by 4 foot wide, the 2 aliens put me on that mat, which it felt like cold wet clay which can stile can be molded ,befor thay left thay gave me a shot in my #1privet whith a siver surige/ type needle gun.I was ther for about ten min, while in that time it felt like i was skinking in the clay, my leags and hands where comply sumerge ,only my tows where on the surfes,my hip was about 3/4 sumerg,and the rest of my boddy was about 1/2 sumerged in the subdece,then about five minets latter the subdence feelt like it was hard as rock and then a female came in,but she did not look like the aliens,she looked a hybereds i rean about. then she cercle around me for a few minets.Then a had a bad thout in my head. That i was going to be used for biologcul and repoduteve experments and I was right.Then she came on top of me and started rubing me all over whit some kind of slick gell in her hands all over and in ever cereaves of the rest of my avable boady betwean my tows every where,and then she started, for 2 houres i had sexual contact then it was ended.After that all of them came out from behind the glass come in and got me out out of the subsence,and cared me off to the expmeal lab agen.Whean thay laded me on the table agean,then one of them aculy talked to me.He said (do you want to rember whappen here?) some how in some way i said (yes).Then he noded in agement. Then thay stared to do serverl probes to me(which all of them huret a holl bunch).which one of them put a long needle in my eye .then thay said that thay will be back for me. Then thay lowerd a full body mask over my body and it a lot of needles in it ,and about 30 sec. later all of the perserd my skin ( it felt like hail brock out ) i feelt bliding all over my body, then it black me out, next thang i new i woke up naked in my bed agen. the only scare is on my arm which has 5 docts which is a squre and a dot in the midle.But now thay heald up.

    no,this is no prank this relly happed. i swer it god.